In Loving Memory of Peter Douglas Tooth

IN LOVING MEMORY OF PETER DOUGLAS TOOTH
1960 – 2024

Some deep heart thoughts from Peter’s wife Vasi, for sangha members…

The realisation of impermanence feels as if it is lurking in the shadows as I am numb and choosing denial as my default position just to give my heart a rest. Then I watch Peter’s service again, prayers, love and Petey stories flood back in and this does help my heart to stabilise. Sangha is palpable and it’s a ‘we are all doing this together for Pete’ which brings so much comfort and ease. It’s a profound oscillation from samsaric patterning wrapped in, poor me, I have lost my Dharma life mate, to an oceanic vastness of – all will be OK. Peter is OK, held and loved by so many wishing the ultimate for him. How blessed we truly are.

In the lead up to his funeral we had prayers over Peter's body – when Khenpo la and some of the sangha came and prayed for him – they then turned to me, eyes filled with love and sensing that Peter was at ease and doing well. I am not sure how else to say this, but I truly believe with all my heart that collectively we are helping him traverse the bardo knowing he was so loved and cherished. 

He was truly happy these past several months, the most I have ever felt from him. He would beam with so much enthusiasm preparing for the end of the 3-year Autumn Buddhist Philosophy Course, absolutely loved Dino and their group. He was overjoyed to be organising another Karma Yoga Group Retreat in August, at Kamalashila Tibetan Buddhist Centre (KTBC) in Tilba, this filled his heart. As Tony Richardson said, “it was as though his heart was too big for his body, so he had to leave it behind”. May it be so. May it be so for us all!

Pete was brimming with delight having ordered the ‘beaut tilt trailer’ for a carting rocks job near the water tank at KTBC, an otherwise time-consuming and laborious job. His mode was, here one minute, gone the next. There could be no other exit for Pete, as hard and challenging as it has felt for so many of us. Maybe that rude awakening was his parting gift – “c’mon don't waste time – we could be gone tomorrow!”

We put in a request for no autopsy on religious grounds – with Khenpo’s guidance and Jack’s emails – miraculously his body was released from the coroners the very next day. I think as practitioners we would be wise to include this in our final requests. Don’t disturb the body. Do we really need to know cause of death. He had no embalming done and had colour right till the end where we had prayers again for his body before he entered the fire. He looked beautifully at peace.

What a journey for us all – he certainly touched us with his grace. 

Around the turn of the century, Aenpo Rinpoche came into our orbit – for 15 or so years He stirred us all up, opened our hearts, and then vanished, so to speak. Peter was heartbroken. We all were.

In 2016, Penny M. and I were in Spain with our teachers. We got the brochure for The Complete Path (TCP) there. Penny then tried very hard to encourage me to do TCP the following year. I showed the brochure to Peter. Without hesitation he said “FANTASTIC. Khenpo la is teaching, it’s only down the road (5 hour drive) and we won’t be trekking off around the world Vasi, we are supposed to be living more lightly on the planet, let’s do the three years and see what happens!”

Khenpo la helped to heal Peter’s heartbreak. Tilba became Peter’s chalice.

I will miss you dearly my heart’s companion, my Dharma mate on this immense path! You are now helping so many of us deepen our realisation of impermanence. Thank you for all the goodness you brought into our lives, and your determination to add value to all that you did will linger on in all of us.

Thank you ALL for the prayers you have been saying for Peter and for all the very kind support you have sent my way and to the way of Pete’s family, it’s all been so deeply appreciated. I especially thank all the Great Masters who have been praying for Peter and who have cleared his path in some remarkable ways. 

Om Mani Padme Hum.

~ Vasi

Peter worked so hard and did so much magnificent work at the centre and it was always a great joy to be in his company. He was such a beautiful man with a deep devotion to his practice and we will miss him so much. We will remember all that he did for others and the Dharma. We pray for his swift human rebirth and his continued connection with the precious Buddhadharma.

~ Jack H. (President of Drogmi Buddhist Institute)